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Don't worry I'll catch you. Don't ever worry.

Am I even meant for this world? I feel way too fragile. I'm tired of you being in Afghanistan. I'm tired of anxiety and sleepless nights. I'm tired of my mind wandering to scenarios and thoughts that normal people don't have about their lovers.
Scary thoughts. Scary as fuck scenarios.

My life feels like complete chaos. Would a bit of normalcy be too much to ask? Normalcy for more than a few weeks at a time.

If I could have anything in the world, right now, if I could be anywhere...
I'd be sitting on a dark beach with you, not saying a word, just listening to the moment. I'd die there. I'd be buried there. I'd never leave.

I feel like I've never taken your existence for granted. I feel like I cherish your being, I absolutely adore the fact that you are alive and mine. Always. Forever. And I feel like when you are gone my head is twirling and my brain is broken and my heart is mush and my feet just walk me from one destination to the next without thought.
I just hate living in a city that you don't physically exist in. It bums me out.

8:44 p.m. - 2010-05-02

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