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this is halloween

my dad is having heart surgery in the morning.
i felt completely indifferent until my mom called and sounded really worried, which convinced me to be as well.
for some reason, i just feel like i should be there.
so, naturally i cried because i have a final on monday and just don't have the funds to make a trip this weekend and then next week for christmas.
fuck.
i'm crying because this is my absolute favorite time of year, and it's fucking 75 degrees here and sunny. i want snow and cold. i want scarfs and winter coats. and i'm freaking alone.
i cannot wait to be home. 8 days.
ps- the nightmare before christmas is fabulous

7:58 p.m. - 2009-12-09

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