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ignored pleasure.

i used to let these words roll right off my fingers. i thought that's where i stored them. boy, oh boy, i was wrong.
because you never know how sad you are until you let your heart do the talking. not your fucking fingers.
i'm wrapped up in this huge shirt like it's a safety net. something to fall back into when i'm feeling this down. and out. i'm wrapped up in it, because you used to wrap yourself up in it, too. because at some point i used to think that you were my safety net. but now, i realize that you were more like my oxygen tank.
i'm finally breathing on my own. and very steadily i might say.

i love the sound of these keys, as they hit. it makes so much sense to listen to this song they are making. one pretty little note, singing right after the last. its so familiar, i don't even have to sing along. i already know what the next word is going to be, before it's been played.
it's not healthy to wear this shirt. but it's comforting. and it gets me to sleep at night.

there's beauty in every break down.
so, how come i feel so god damn ugly?

7:38 p.m. - 2008-09-15

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