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you'd better watch where you spit.
lets just move this thing, one limb at a time. to avoid an accident too terrible to clean up with paper towels. we can start with the arms and legs, and save the internal moving for another time. maybe a warmer month for us both. and i'm speaking of warmer inside and out.
lets take this thing in parts. the smallest little bits of time. amounts too rediculously small to even take serious. that way, if we mess up a second, we can fix it with a minute. or an hour, depending on the size of the error.
these words become less and less. and every passing day its like my words diminish, one little bity letter at a time. and instead of paragraphs, i only have sentences. usually one or two at a time. and soon, i think the only word i will remember is goodbye.
i used to cross my fingers and pray. i wonder how many hours in each person's life is spent on wishing on every star. i wonder how many useless words i have wasted on prayers. for you, for sanity, for everything to dry up and bloom in its proper place.
it used to seem like i had nothing but time. every second of the world to waste on everything i could possibly want. when i should have been using the ticks on things that i absolutely needed. now, i have everything i could possibly need, and i'm starting to gain everything that i have wanted. back.
i'm starting to look human again. even if thats not what was meant to occur. i need to be human, it's not a matter of want anymore.
but, like i've said before, if i move slow, things seem to fall right back into their designated areas. and my puzzle starts to look half finished, instead of halfly not even close to complete.
maybe i'm just starting to FINALLY see the picture in the pieces. (i didn't look at the box and cheat this time).
you, not we, are falling slightly behind in the artwork. and everyday it seems like you accept that more. and everyday it seems like you like the back corner better.
whatever, it's your choice.
i'm just going to move in parts. i'm going to cut my own sections of time up. i don't need your help with the knife.
because if i move one limb at a time, it's easier to get where i was going in the first place.
8:11 p.m. - 2005-12-27
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