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this more than a promise kept.

i hate when im about to start my period. i can never control this shit....the way i act. fuck having girl problems that are way way way out of your control.
its at times like this when i come back to this place, where i can still fit my fist perfectly into the wall. the place thats drenched from the rain, (my rain). this place is freezing, im frozen. and i think thats why its so hard to leave.
because we all fall for the ones that make us cry. because he likes me better on my knees. he's a hair puller, a biter....and thats why i keep crawling back and begging for more.
punch me in the face, fucking cut me...but dont take away any of this. anything that i have right now in my life, i want it to stay here (until the sun doesnt exist anymore), forever.
im in the place where i can cry and still feel like the happiest person alive.
i guess im more than you imagined you would get. and that scares me too.
this is when i step back and take a look at my life. this is when i should be patting myself on the back instead of kicking myself in the face.
but ill get dirty for you boy. ill get bloody for you boy. i would make time stop for you boy.
so go to sleep. and dream. (about me)
because i never dream in color.

11:04 p.m. - 2004-10-13

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