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im not the girl that is going to give it all up.

my family gets a phone call this morning at around 6 a.m. i looked on the caller id to find out it was from my grandparents house. my first assumption was that my grandmother had passed away. not soon after the phone rang, i heard my mom leaving in her car, so i kept assuming and figured that she was going over there. i didnt sleep until she came back. and i ran downstairs, and asked what was going on. well, my grandma sees things because of her medication she takes for her parkinson's disease. she saw another woman in bed with my grandpa when she woke up this morning. and when my mom got there, my grandma looked at her and said "i wish i would just die." i dont think i can write how i feel about this, because im pretty sure everyone should already know.

needless to say, i didnt go to class this morning. i have a fever now, along with a headache, a sore body, a stopped up nose, and a sore throat. ive been awake since 6 this morning, just thinking. i cried myself to sleep last night, just thinking. no sleep for me again, third night in a row. i have too much going on right now, i cant handle it. im hurting. i wish i could just sleep for a week, wake up and everything be ok. i hate this.

9:46 a.m. - 2004-05-24

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